i will most definitely do this, don’t doubt me. wait. you have a pikachu onesie? i’m so freaking jealous right now, wait, i wanna see it if that’s not a problem if it is you don’t have to but oh my god wow i’m jealous. i’m down for this, pokemon trainer porter.
dude of course it’s not a problem like i will literally loan this to you whenever you want it. holy shit like henry didn’t tell me you were this rad, professor hemsworth.
wait are your grandparents those really cute, old couples who sit out on their porch with an old dog if so let me meet them and make them cookies. we’re in the same category omg i love pikachu he’s my spirit animal, tbh i want to come back as pikachu but with swag like lil b.. i like you, good choice
honestly that’s a good summary of my grandparents, just make sure their the soft oatmeal cookies and you’ll probably win their heart. i can accept that answer partly because it’d be wrong of me not to in my pikachu onesie. we’re literally going to be best friends oh my god.
just having pancakes with my nice maple syrup in canadurr, don’t ‘cha know? … hi, i’m ryan and i said that already but who’s your favourite pokemon this is the test
running away with a canadian boy goes against everything my southern grandparents stand for but i’m gonna do it anyways oh my god. —you literally are asking the real questions right now. jolteon, no contest. yours?
oh my god i wish i was lil b. he’s actually perfect. i pray to him every single day, literally what i aspire to be. wait can i just lie and say i’m lil b because i am so down wait
… oh my god. oh my god i’ve been searching forever for you. where have you been my whole life? —hi i’m porter by the way.